Je Suis Le MaeMae: In Which I Obnoxiously Discuss Things I Miss About France

It wasn't easy to walk away from my home, Lil' Greenie, and go overseas not sure of what I'd find last summer. I love my little home. It is just perfect for lil' me.

But when Mom started packing her (really stinking large) bags last August I made it clear I needed to pack a bag myself. And pack we did. And travel together we did. And plans we made to do the same thing again this August. This coming Wednesday, to be exact. This time around it is different. I know what to expect. I'm prepared for the outpouring of love from my French fans. I am aware that when I walk down the street people will oooh and ahhh at my beauty. (Good news for those who are not multi-lingual like I am - you can understand the sounds of passerby fawning over you in any language.)

I'm also prepared for a few activities in which I truly excel (like napping, snuggie modeling, and essentially always looking phenom). Lately I've been anticipating returning to an incredible place, La Bastide St. Antione in Grasse. If you followed my jaunts through La Cote D'Azur last summer then you'll likely remember this amazing place. If you know my mother, then you'll especially remember it as she NEVER STOPS TALKING ABOUT IT EVEN IN HER SLEEP PLEASE BE QUIET MOM RIGHT NOW GAH.

I mean, you have to hand it to her. It is really lovely. And the people are incredibly gracious. And the food - which is what matters most if you're a Swann - is bananas. That's right, I watch Rachel Zoe. And if she was with us at La Bastide, after giving my mom a much-needed makeover, mid-bite of a crepe she'd be all, "I DIE." And then she'd put the fork down because we all know Rach doesn't ever finish her food. Who can eat when they are coming undone? No one, that's who.

Anyway.

You can't really go to La Bastide without me. Who would help you read your menu? What if you can't decide between the fish or the chicken? The crepe with strawberries or the crepe with honey and sugar? THE CHOICES WILL KILL YOU, PEOPLE!

I die.

Food is much easier when I'm around. I simply read the menu, translate it for you, and if you like, taste test it when you arrive. Have to be sure it is cooked correctly!

What can I say? I'm a giver.

After our third meal there last summer (and, yea, we go a lot, getoveritalready. We tend to get a little obsessed with some places) the staff wisely offered me a job.