(No. Don't say that the trip is over.)
Our last day in France...yes, yes...it is high time I blog about it. I realize this. I know you've all been hitting refresh every hour of every day wondering, "Where art thou, The Mae Mae?"
I have recognized the heartache I've caused so many. And I am forever sorry.
Ok. We good now? Great. Fabulous. Let's get back to biz-nass, folks!
So the final full day in France arrived one fateful Sunday morning and none of us were ready to welcome it. None of us. So much so that Papa fell into quite the little moody-tudy! It was as if this was the final day of his life. NOT the final day of vacay. That should tell you something.
When peeps know their time with me is coming to an end, they struggle.
What? You thought the struggle was that they were leaving!? HA! No! Get with the program. The Humans Who Love Me are also the Humans Who Hate to See Me Go. I lie not. Grandling was already mourning the fact that there would be no more Mornings with Mayesie.
Heck. If I had to say goodbye to me, I'd mourn it, too! What a hardship this must be on people.
So we began the day with our village tradition: breakfast. Auntie Squooshle and Papa walk into town and then once my mother rips her LAZY BONES from bed, she and Grandling drive in with me and meet them at breakfast.
We had the same breakfast every day and yum-to-the-yum-to-my-tum-tum-tum.
Here's my main course: a giant yellow lab served up to me on a platter. Yea, baby! Come to mama....
Does he not make your heart swoon? This was the village pup. He roams around all of Cabris all day. When I'm up in town, he's of course curled up near me. Sometimes I give him kisses.
And sometimes I dance.
He loves it when I dance. I've got moves, folks. If you ever need lessons, gimme a call. Mmm-kay?
After breakfast, our moods were growing increasingly worse. There was hardly anything we could think of that would brighten the day. And then. It came to us.
MAKE MY TAN DEEPER!
YES! Allowing me to continue to bronze myself was the answer to all our worries. No more tears, people! I'm going to throw on my bikini and lay out!
And so we did. For hours.
It was deeeee-lightful. A day spent in the Riviera sunshine...just enjoying each other...laughing...napping...reading...(Mama still had her nose buried in that Twilight series and continued to mutter longings for some vampire named Edward Cullen. The very fact that EDWARD AND HIS FAMILY EAT ANIMALS FOR DINNER should have driven her far, far, far from the pages of his life. But NOOOOOO. When it comes to Mama's love for reading, clearly her love for me is knocked to the side.) Thanks for nothing, Mother.
I need therapy.
So does she, come to think of it....
...but I digress.
Later in the day our little American tummies realized our need for food. And because Papa is the single most brilliant man on the planet (sorry all my puppy lovers, but it is true. you'll never be as clever as my Papa)...he knew right where to go for dinner.
La Jarrerie in Bar Sur Loup, where we stayed last summer.
Grandling and Papa love La Jarrerie and had begun the trip there this summer with their first meal. What a great way to come full circle. So we jumped in the shower, put on a tub of after-sun-lotion and got ready for a lovely drive across the Alps-Maritimes.
I called in hair and makeup and aren't you glad I did? Look at me! Amazing! Tanned and silky. Good gracious I'm beautiful. (Ignore the women in the picture. What really matters here is ME PEOPLE.)
Once we got to Bar Sur Loup we realized we were far too early for dinner. It was only 630!
But the folks there love my grandparents. I kid you not. And of course, my mesmerizing eyes definitely helped. Although they were not yet open, they offered us a lovely table in the garden, brought us candies, bread, and tapenade...and cool soft drinks to ease off the heat of the day.
And yes, I enjoyed several cubes of raw sugar. Why? Because I can! I am the Mae Mae!
Our dinner officially began a little over an hour later...but we didn't leave the restaurant until nearly 11. It was that much fun!
It was mainly fun b/c I was passed from lap to lap, fed sugar cubes, served ice cold water in my very own bowl and later Paul, our server, brought champagne and roses out as a gift.
I tell you what, folks, it pays to travel with the Mae Mae. Free drinks! Free roses! FREE ATTENTION ALL THE TIME.
My life is so fabulous. Who is jealous? Raise your paw!!
The evening was spent sharing stories from the trip. First we told the Swann traditional "BMOTs" (Best Memory of Trip) and then we added something new: BEST MEMORY OF THE MAE. I felt that this was genius. It ensured a least a full hour of talking about nothing but me.
Now that's deep and meaningful conversation, folks.
After dinner we drove back to the villa and Mama and Auntie Squooshle sat in the back and wept over how cold they were. I, on the other hand, was happily curled up in Grandling's lap enjoying the warmth of her Southern Heart. (Hi, Grandling! That was me being nice! Now send me another gift. Thanks!)
Once back at home The Humans Who Love Me started to pack up. This did not please me. So I unpacked their bags a few times.
Mama and Auntie Squooshle tried to figure out ways to not have to leave. My ideas were better. They included hiding in the laundry room, climbing an olive tree, buying the mansion down the street, and of course, my most genius, hurl myself into the pool, fake my own death, win over the hearts and minds of all of Southern France as the media covers my tragic demise and then bust out of the casket in the middle of my funeral and live off my fame as the "DOG WHO LIVED" for the rest of my life in Cabris.
Good, right?
Too bad no one let me at least try it.
The day wound to a close and I curled up with Mama as the cool breeze blew the scent of lavender into the room one last time...I took a deep breath and sighed...I wasn't ready to go home...
And now that I AM HOME...I am still mad about it. More on that later.
Love & Licks,
The Mae Mae
XOXO
